In early December, I gave my first ever journaling workshop and those are the words I wrote to wrap up my introduction. I was talking about the fact that journaling can offer something different for every one of us and that our journals can take any form that we wish or need them to.
It's one thing to know that those words up there are true -- and I absolutely, with all my heart, know that they are -- but it is quite something else indeed to live them.
I struggled in 2012 to live up to the person I thought I should be, to do things the right way.
This project -- this website, these journal pages, guided journaling in general -- on which I spend a great deal of my time, is not in any way similar to the daily activities carried on by my immediate circle of friends and family. That, coupled with my own peculiar brand of social awkwardness -- breathtaking to witness, I assure you -- makes it challenging for me at times (pretty much all of 2012, for example) to assess my progress, my contribution, and deep, deep down, my worthiness. From an occupational and social perspective, I don't tend to operate in the same way that other people in my life do. I spend my days differently, I spend my time differently, I think about and prioritize different stuff. In the end, I became overwhelmed by the notion that doing it differently meant that I wasn't doing it right.
The lesson, of course, is that there is no one, right way. There are at least a zillion right ways and our primary task is to find our own right way, even if it doesn't match up easily and conveniently with convention, tradition or the prevailing winds of propriety.
I love people who have the courage to be who they truly are, warts and all. They are inevitably the most interesting, the most genuine, the most challenging. I aspire to that level of courage and this blog is the best way I can think of to achieve it.
My plan for 2013 is to spend a great deal of it here at Grace is Overrated continuing to create guided journals, searching for answers, meeting new people in new ways, and working on courage and acceptance -- warts and all.
Thank you so much for all of your support throughout 2012. Your feedback and encouragement brighten my days and keep me moving forward when hesitation and self-doubt strike. I look forward to a new year sparkling with creative energy (stickers!) and constructive reflection.
It seems fitting, then, to post my next revised journal page; number 4 to be exact. As with the last three revisions, I started with the original journal page (no. 4), tweaked the design, added a little, took away a little, et voila!
The colour-it-yourself version looks a little like this . . .
Wishing you all the best this new year, friends.
P.S. I have lots more to share about my first ever journaling workshop! I hope to post about it later in the week.